Sung to: “Love Potion No. 9”
A parody by M. James
That Borg Picard said, “Now look here, Sisko”
“Bajorans need us and you have to go”
I couldn’t believe where I’d finally been assigned
Some dinky little place named, Deep Space Station Nine
Bajoran Kira is the attaché
I know she wants us all to – go away
The food replicators are tormenting Chief O’Brien
And even my own son hates, Deep Space Station Nine
Bridge: My Science Officer was once a little old man
The Doctor tries to flirt with her whenever he can
I have to be polite to snotty Cardassians
A good thing that I’m known to be – a patient man
My Constable is the shifter Odo
Each sixteen hours he becomes Jell-O
A Ferengi named Quark hawking porno all the time
And now we’ve got a wormhole near, Deep Space Station Nine
Bridge: We met another race that moved as quick as a wink
Their questions came and went so fast, I hardly could think
The scenes were changing back and forth before I could blink
I saw my life, I saw my wife – I need a drink
This stable wormhole changes everything
We’ll be a place that’s really happening
The tourists are coming so I better not resign
‘Cause someone’s got to watch this zoo – Deep Space Station Nine
Deep Space Station Nine
Deep Space Station Nine
Deep Space Station Nine
