Sung to: “We Didn’t Start the Fire” by Billy Joel
A Star Trek Parody by M. James 6/91
Captain Pike, Number One, Star Trek’s saga has begun
Vina, Vians, Talos IV’s a no-no
Mr. Spock, Captain Kirk, seems a premise that will work
Gary Mitchell, ESP, where no man can go.
Yeoman Rand, Doc McCoy, Charlie X is just a boy,
Riley, Miri, Romulan invasion
Captain Kirk is split in two, Edith Keeler dies for you
Khan, Gorn, Horta, spores, shore leave’s some vacation
CHORUS: WE DIDN’T START THE SERIES
BUT WE KEPT IT GOING ‘CAUSE WE KEPT IT SHOWING
WE DIDN’T START THE SERIES
NO WE DIDN’T WRITE IT, BUT WE DID IGNITE IT
Pon Farr, Nomad, Vaal, mirror, mirror on the wall
Catspaw, Harry Mudd, Cochran, and Apollo
Klingons, tribbles, Koloth, Kor, and a private littlewar
Sargon, Triskellion, M-5’s got to go
Robert Lansing, Terri Garr, their assignment wasn’t far
Decker, Krako, Akaar, and growing old
Rome, Nazis, Cohms, and flags, one more Earth will make me gag
Cancellation, call the stations, letters keep the show afloat!
CHORUS
Third season has begun, is there somewhere I can run?
Hippies, Wild West, this is not Trek at its best
Zarabeth and Gideon, Scotty’s got a new girlfriend
Lincoln, Gorgan, give it a rest
Chekov is our new Russian, Kirk is webbed by Tholians
Surak, Elaan, Plato’s kids are not kind
Blondes and nymphomaniacs, please put Mr. Spock’s brain back
Janice, Jim, the last show’s in, Star Trek’s gone in ‘69
CHORUS
Star Trek is reborn, showing up in movie form
Decker, V’Ger, uniforms of white and gray
Spock dies in the Wrath of Kahn, but is saved by fal tor pan
Saavik, David, the ship’s blown away
Back in time to save the whales, Kirk and crew stay out of jail
Shatner directs Number 5, but Star Trek is still alive
CHORUS
Star Trek’s back on prime TV, everybody come and see
Jean-Luc, Crusher, Riker, Worf, and Geordi
Troi is a half Betazoid, Data is a smart android
Tasha Yar has come and gone, but her absence won’t be long
Say goodbye to young Wesley, welcome back to Beverly
Barclay, Guinan, Q, and O’Brien
Laugh in the Ferengi’s face, but the Borg’s a scary race
Romulans and civil war, season five will have still more!
CHORUS: WE DIDN’T START THE SERIES
BUT WE KEPT IT GOING ‘CAUSE WE KEPT IT SHOWING
WE DIDN’T START THE SERIES
BUT WHEN WE ARE GONE
IT WILL STILL RUN ON AND ON AND ON
WE DIDN’T START THE SERIES
BUT WE KEPT IT GOING ‘CAUSE WE KEPT IT SHOWING
WE DIDN’T START THE SERIES
NO WE DIDN’T WRITE IT, BUT WE DID IGNITE IT
(REPEAT AND FADE)
